life gets very complacent..... routine, work same same.... I've been in and out of these 'lost' feelings for years now.
You know..... after all this time, I still wonder what it would feel like to be held by you again. Just reminising on the good times we have shared. Just a moment in time..... nothing more. Just to be reminded that you are still there.
To know you still think of me too makes me feel so comforted :)
Yeah its kind of just a safe place if you know what I mean. And I do know what you mean I have been living in regret for so many years. Not regretting how my life worked out but regret letting someone that means so much to me go so easily. And it has been at the point I wake up from dreams still expecting to have you asleep next to me. Dont get me wrong I love my wife and all but I knew a long time ago I would not be marrying my soul mate:(
I chose my life path..... and it has worked out well for me. I made sacrifices to have this 'life' which I feel EVERY DAY..... But I don't so much 'regret' those decisions... more just full of wonder.... the what if's?? Living with the empty space that now exists within me.
I think we need to accept our choices, but that doesn't mean it has to end there. What we feel inside will never leave us..... we will have that forever.
You know as well as I do what we had (if only we could've blocked out the world). The connection we had is next level...... I've never felt anything like it.
That empty space within me will always be you. and you are right I thought I was bloody mad still thinking of you day in and day out after so long but Ive learnt to just keep being me and carrying on because this is the path I chose aswell. It makes me sad to know how you feel about it all and it makes me smile knowing how you feel about it :)
So there is this page here where you can find me anytime of the day or week or what ever. just so you know there is always someone thinking about you even tho Im not there.
sad and happy at the same time sums up my feelings right now too. Just so you know..... I've been trying to figure out how to incorporate a part of us in a tattoo design for the last 10years. (you know me.... takes me years to get things just right hahaha).
I'm aiming to get it in July/August this year. It could have multiple meanings so I can get away with it :) But you and I will know the truth
Bloody hell girl youre in my head I was going to get a tattoo with a compass ;) N up top with a S down below. As you said no one would know. Im so glad you reached out yesterday. Ive always wanted to but didnt. I would just think you are living youre perfect life happy as :(
I would love to see it when its done yep the lyrics nice touch. I find most linkin park takes my mind back to you, I still chill out to abit of burning in the skies aswell but you can always count on in the end being on the rock just about everyday. I deleted most trace to this website out of my Facebook too. God forbid I would survive the outcome haha;) but this is so good for my feels :)
I'll do the same. I wont be allowed my tat if this is seen! hahahaha Please don't ever leave me...... It's nice knowing you are still here feeling what I feel and truly understanding these messed up feels lol
so now im listening to it and remember the streams of tears I have shed over the years to this song!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cried so many hours when we went our seperate ways. Parked up on the side of the road an absolute mess feeling like i had no where to go, no one to talk too missing my best friend
I know the feeling :( its hard to justify to others why a song makes you sad ,when you cant say why. I remember lots Of good times together when we were way younger and when we were older. Silly weekend stuff haha staying at my brothers :)
Thats really neat. So cool that we're fully on the same page. Ive been listening to music from the 2000s all night with my mate Muz. Cried during in the end without chester (was his tribute song) lucky i have good friends that understand the power of music
Im quite restricted with the friends i have just in the fact I moved jobs a year ago and I was really tight with my old work buddies. Ive made new friends here but nothing like when I was working in Napier. Me and my best man were really tight but since moving out to Chb were always busy and dont really catch up much so Ive only really got me to talk to when it comes to the hard stuff. Where I work is really choice awesome bunch of guys in a work shop all sort of round the same age into same music so our stereo only has the rock or its spotify and its always throwbacks of the good tunes we had growing up. I only ask if everything is alright at home because you sound lonely :(. Im lonely because well **** I dont know how long my marriage will last , we dont get along when we do its great but lately it seems we argue more than not. And she is not a very nice person to argue with if you catch my drift. I fear i would lose my girls and everything I have at the drop of a hat. but hey thats the bed I made and now I sleep in it :( damn this page gets me thinking so much about everything a shame its not a messaging thing but its safe I guess. Enjoy your morning
Any ideas ? There is no way I would be able to get over ways. thats hard part about living so far away ;( I could call you on my lunch break if you still rocking the same number. 12ish?
No worries Ill ring off work phone :) would you like me to try remove everything on here ? If I can? It does feel weird having all the dirty washing hanging up here. but to be honest I chose this becoz the last activity on here was years ago haha
